that something as necessary as drinking water is a chore onto itself.
that something as natural as breathing is painfully difficult.
that want for a worser condition seems ironically better than this sapping limbo.
that yearning for a chasm to fall into becomes inherently quintessential.
that what is of now feels right though it probably sounds downright sickly bizarre.
that being this ill is an actual respite.
that being is a punishment unto itself.
that delusion precedes all else.